Regret

Today I went to play tennis with my dad and my sister. She and Dad argued a bit, after which point there was really no reason to keep playing. Naturally, I realized on our way out (we were still in the driveway of the club) that I have a tennis match against IHA, a tough team, tomorrow, and I had taken about two serves and hit no more than thirty or forty shots. Obviously, yelling to Dad to turn around wasn't a viable option. So now I have to think "Oh my god, I'm not ready for the match. And my serve is still really weak. And AHA killed us."

Now, for the philosophical stuff I promised in my last entry.

That regret disappeared almost as soon as we got home and I ate some junk food. But what is the real difference between such short-term regret and longer, more important feelings. Maybe it's that I can easily blame today's incident on my sister. But maybe it's because what I did wrong today only affects tomorrow. For example, I still regret not trying harder to beat my teammate in the match that would determine who got to play singles. I could sort of blame that on my mother. After all, we didn't get to play a full tiebreaker because she was waiting. But mostly, I blame it on the fact that I didn't play hard enough, that I missed too many serves, that I hit too many balls out.

Now you, my sole reader (you know who you are), may wonder why on earth I chose this topic. If you were looking over my shoulder, however, you would know exactly how this topic came up. I'll give you a hint. I was listening to music...I was listening to Finale B from Rent. Forget regret. I don't know if it's just me, but I think that it takes a certain kind of person to truly forget regret. And I'm definitely not one of them.